Grayson Murray, 1993-2024

C.W.: Suicide references 

Normally a week like this, what with the PGA Championship the week before, would be pretty quiet. Many bigwigs take off a week or two before the next high-profile event or otherwise opting to make another start. However, this week's quiet was broken by nothing short of a tragedy--and I don't mean my Wolves blowing Game 2 of the conference finals against the Mavs.

May he rest in peace, and may his memory be a blessing.

On Friday, Grayson Murray WD from the Colonial National Invitation, known for sponsorship reasons as the Charles Schwab Challenge, after three consecutive bogeys. Despite these those struggles, Murray could still have made the weekend, it turned out, by going -1 the last two holes. Instead, he said he was sick and quit. But nothing could have prepared anybody--not his fellow-players, not the fans in the stands, not the T.V. audiences around the world, not the PGA Tour itself and definitely not his family and fiancée--for what was to befall them. The next morning, Murray was found dead, and the day after, his parents confirmed he had committed suicide.

The news hit like a thousand sledgehammers falling randomly from the sky. The percussion track in the usual theme for CBS' coverage was suppressed at the weekend as soon as they came on the air to broadcast the action Saturday out of reverence for Murray. This was just four and a half months after he had won the Sony Open in Hawai'i--his second win on the Tour and first full-point victory. Just a month and a half after his Masters debut, where he made the cut. Just a week or so after making the PGA Championship cut and less than that after securing an exemption to the U.S. Open. And just weeks before he was to marry the love of his life.

I mentioned on a community post on my YouTube channel, which is a companion to this blog, that Grayson Murray suffered depression; and as one with depression myself, I have sought to live life as I am able. There are good days and bad days with the condition, so I could relate to Grayson's struggles in a way, even though I never knew the guy on any personal level.

Back at Colonial National came the outpouring of tears. Valspar Championship winner Peter Malnati, in particular, sobbed during his interview with Amanda Balionis of CBS. Webb Simpson, who knew Grayson from his junior days in North Carolina and early university days at Wake Forest, was also moved to emotion greatly. Jay Monahan personally flew into DFW to be with the players. Meanwhile, on the Korn Ferry Tour, Harry Higgs--himself trying to get back to the PGA Tour, in which endeavour he should succeed--dedicated his two-hole playoff win to Grayson's memory. By the time Davis Riley polished off a fairly high-profile field including top-ranked Scottie Scheffler, no prize money, no FedEx Cup points, no silly little trophy (or not-so-little trophy) or tartan jacket or 1975 Schwab roadster could take away the meaning of this tragedy. Sports success comes and goes, but the loss of a human life is forever.

In conclusion, I commend Grayson on his honesty in terms of his depression and alcoholism. In a sport that trolls its practitioners for length of days like none other, his vulnerability is to be remembered and honoured. Perhaps this quality, above all his ability as a golfer, is why they dared play on at the Schwab Challenge. It has also led me to coin a Latin motto for the Devilish Rake: Facere pro qui non possunt. To do for those who can't. That, I feel, will be Grayson's lasting legacy, long after the players, organizers and broadcasters move on, long after Grayson's parents bury him, long after his premaritally widowed fiancée (hopefully) finds someone new to love. Remember Grayson Murray.

Edward the Scop

Best Friends Forever

In case you're wondering if this is my Upper Midwest Connection of the Week for last week's golf, it's not. I didn't feel there was anybody worthy of the plaudits after Troy Merritt struggled in Bermuda (he did make the cut, but didn't do all that well and fell to #123 in the FedEx Cup Fall standings) and O.J. Farrell, former Wisconsin Badger from England, faltered at DP World Tour Q-School finals, missing the top 70 and ties cut that is made four rounds (of six) in. Rather, this is a follow-up piece on the context surrounding the life of the most recent Umcee to be so honoured.

When I last reported on these matters, I noted that Erik van Rooyen was BFFs with University of Minnesota teammate Jon Trasamar; the two had played together at the U from 2009-2013. As such, they kept in touch often, though their paths diverged. Erik became a fairly big-time golfer, while Jon toiled on minitours like the Dakotas Tour, where he won five times. I also mentioned that last year, Jon started to suffer melanoma. It became stage IV; and though it went into remission, enabling him to resume competitive golf, it came back with a vengeance, afflicting his entire body. What I didn't mention was that a family friend named Bailey Haley set up a GoFundMe page to help fund treatments for Jon's cancer back in February of this year. As of this writing, the goal of $150K has been surpassed, and the total levied is now nearly $156K.

I also failed to mention in the first piece that it was thought Jon Trasamar would live another six to ten weeks, according to van Rooyen in his presser following the third round of his World Wide Technology Championship triumph in Mexico. This would have seen Jon through to maybe shortly after New Year. But I did mention that, if van Rooyen got enough FedEx Cup points to skip the Bermuda Championship as a result of his performance at the WWT, he would visit Jon at the Mayo Clinic. Indeed, he did that two days later as he had promised, along with his caddie (and other college teammate) Alex Gaugert. I saw pictures of Erik arriving at the place on his Instagram that day, as well as a Golf Channel interview later on after he had visited his bestie.

It was the last time he saw Jon alive. On Veterans Day (or Armistice/Remembrance Day, as EVR would more likely call it), 11 November 2023, Jon Trasamar died at the age of 33. A few days later, his widow Allie wrote on the aforementioned GoFundMe page:

It is with the heaviest of hearts that I share the news of Jon's passing. Over the past few weeks, Jon was surrounded by an outpouring of love as friends and family reached out to him and travelled from all over the country to be with him. The joy he found in those moments with his loved ones are memories I will forever hold close to my heart.

Throughout his diagnosis, Jon showed unwavering strength, grace and humility, confronting any challenges he faced without complaint. He was, and continues to be, an inspiration to many and has left an indelible mark on those who knew him.

Thank you for praying for my husband--reaching out to him, thinking of him--and for your incredible generosity. I will forever be grateful for the kindness you've shown us during this immensely difficult time....Whenever you encounter a sequence of ones--be it the time or another numerical pattern--I encourage you to think of Jon--a life well-lived and full of love.

It is thought that a memorial of some sort will be held at the weekend following the Thanksgiving holiday, according to Ryan French of Monday Q Info.

As for me, I froze in my chair as I ate breakfast upon hearing the news of Jon's death. Though I didn't know Jon personally, what I wouldn't do for a chance to console Erik van Rooyen and other Gopher teammates of his from that part of last decade. It was because of them that my interest in golf persisted, even when other sports like football, basketball and hockey (to say naught of soccer) held sway in my mind.

Every night until the memorial/funeral arrangements for Jon Trasamar are finalized and implemented, I will meditate--maybe with a prayer, maybe with soft music, maybe just the dark silence--at 11:11pm. It is my way, however insignificant, of remembering one of the reasons I follow Umcees in tour golf.

May Jon Trasamar live in the hearts of Umcees in tour golf.

May he live in the hearts of all who labour in, and are heavy-burdened by, the grind toward professional glory.

May he live in the hearts of college golfers who have an eye toward said grind, which to many of them is its own excuse.

May he live in the hearts of high-school golfers who seek for a leg up on other grinders, that the road may not feel so long or dark.

May he live in the hearts of all who, though having ruled out playing careers, have taken it upon themselves to teach the next generation of players.

May he live in the hearts of fans who, regardless of their interest in playing or teaching golf, are nonetheless supportive of those who have made it their vocation in some capacity.

May he live in the hearts of those struggling with terminal illnesses like he did, regardless of their interest in or attitudes toward golf.

May he live in the hearts of those who help the terminally ill.

May he live in the hearts of the family and friends of the terminally ill.

May he live in the hearts of those who scoff at the naysayers.

May he live in the hearts of all who live, used to live or go/went to school in the Upper Midwest. He was truly one of us.

Edward the Scop